Employee invites boyfriend to her work trip and asks him to cover the expenses until she gets reimbursed, only to refuse to pay him back: ‘You promised to repay me and didn't’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Jul 21, 2025 9:00 AM EDT

They say to never mix your personal life with your work life, but you never know to what extent this statement goes until you experience it firsthand.

Obviously, most people assume this saying applies to when you consider working with your friends and family, to which the advice is – don't. Even if you and your partner came up with the most brilliant idea for a business, working together is not recommended. Don't date your coworker, don't hire your sister, mixing work and family can only lead to the destruction of either your personal or your work life.

But that leads to the question – just how far should one keep the separation between the two? Can your partner meet your coworkers? Should people at work know anything about your personal life? How much of what happens at work should you tell your parents?

While different people may have different answers to these questions, maybe after reading the story below, we would all agree that you should keep the separation as extensive as possible. Keep scrolling to find out why.

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10529171712
    via pixelshot

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Money is a big factor in why relationships and work do not mix, and the couple in this story would definitely agree. Especially after the boyfriend found out his girlfriend lied to him about her work trip, just so that she wouldn't have to pay him back for the money he spent on it.

  • 02

    Fiancé lied and spent all of the money she was reimbursed for after her work trip that I paid for. AITAH?

    My fiancé had a work trip planned to attend a conference. I decided to tag along because it was a city that I had never been
    via SIowLearner
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    to before. She informed me that her work would reimburse her after the trip once she submitted an expense report. Her credit
    via SIowLearner
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    card was completely maxed out and didn't have enough money to cover any of the costs so I offered to help pay since she was going to be reimbursed.
    via SIowLearner
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    So I ended up covering 4 nights in the hotel that her conference was located in ($800), her plane ticket ($450), my plane ticket ($350), and the rental car ($400). I knew from the
    via SIowLearner
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    start that I would have to cover my ticket since I was just tagging along and I was fine with that. So in total for travel I spent right around $2000 on my credit card.
    via SIowLearner
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    After the trip I helped her submit the expense report, and at that time she told me that her work would not cover the rental car, and would only cover the
    via SIowLearner
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    Ubers to and from the airport since the conference was at the hotel and all of the breakfasts/lunch/dinners were catered. I was
    via SIowLearner
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    bummed about hearing that because I was out another $400, for a total of $750 for the trip and that was a lot more than I was planning on spending. We
    via SIowLearner
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    submitted the expense report for a total of $1250, she said she would pay me back once she received the money, I said that was fine and submitted a Zelle request.
    via SIowLearner
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    Fast forward two weeks the Zelle request expired, I asked her about the money and she said they still hadn't paid out the expense report, I figured
    via SIowLearner
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    whatever and submitted another request. Two more weeks went by and still she had not received the expense report, I told her to ask and she let me
    via SIowLearner
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    know that they would pay out on her next paycheck that was 2 weeks away, I submitted another Zelle request.
    via SIowLearner
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    7581.21 6035.33 1255.17 581.21 4546.23 7581.21 6387.44 4546.23 5.33 7581.21 21 4546.23 7581.21 638 45 M+ REIMBURSEMENT
    via designer491

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    On her payday (yesterday) we went out for drinks and I asked her about it again. She admitted that she had received the money a few weeks back, and had
    via SIowLearner
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    already spent it on "us". I got upset because she had promised me that money, and I told her it wasn't for her to decide how to spend my money, money
    via SIowLearner
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    that wasn't hers. She got defensive and said that it wasn't my money, and that they had paid it into her account. Obviously I got furious and said some
    via SIowLearner
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    things that I probably shouldn't have, and she finally sent me $800, which was the rest of her paycheck for the next two weeks. Honestly I don't
    via SIowLearner
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    want her paycheck, I want the expense report money, I want the money that she promised to repay me and didn't. I feel lied to and cheated on in a way and
    via SIowLearner
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    now she is ped because she doesn't have any money. Also if she gives me her whole paycheck then I am going to have to cover all of her expenses
    via SIowLearner
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    anyways so it doesn't make sense, and will just create more resentment over the next 2-4 weeks.. She is mad at me, but she still hasn't apologized, or
    via SIowLearner
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    even recognized any wrong doings because she feels like the money her work gave her is hers, and it's fine because she spent it on "us". AITAH?
    via SIowLearner
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    SensibleFriend NTA - She is TA for continually lying and not paying you back. How are you going to stay in a relationship with a person who lied and stole your
    via SensibleFriend
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    money and doesn't even seem to care? If you stay, YTA to yourself and whatever else happens in the future is your own fault.
    via SensibleFriend
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    facinationstreet Honestly this is a break- upable offense. She is terrible with money (maxed out cc and could not have afforded to go to the conference if it weren't for you), she lied
    via facinationstreet
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    about the rental car, she stole the money from you and lied for weeks. She was hoping you'd just forget $800? She's is also dumb. NTA but I wouldn't marry her.
    via facinationstreet
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    Humble-Progress8295 Nta looks like shes one of the "your money is my money and my money is my money" type of person. You should strongly reconsider the whole marriage idea because the situation will never improve
    via Humble-Progress8295

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relationship advice aita drama job work relationship-drama reddit story relationships advice couples love workplace work trip fiancé Reddit money dating
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